Saturday, 4 February 2012

Hard to get?

Are you overpowered by a man? Unfortunately I have been swayed by the lovey dovey rubbish that I used to be repulsed by! 

My usual student traits of leering over the likes of Paul Walker and Mario Falcone have been reformed for comfy sofa nights in with a dominos and cute spooning sessions. A manly personality that can take control of a passionate night seems so far away, when all I want is an old fashioned and meaningful bond. From buying magic corn so we can try the whole menu of flavours together to irritating each other by taking ages when clothes shopping, we have the foundations of a good relationship.

I assure you it is not the ripped body, golden skin and beautiful surfer hair that keeps me hooked, it is the good old clich√© of ‘treat ‘em mean, keep ‘em keen’ that is such an effective tool. This distance between us makes the three words people either strive for or dread a mission away! The L word is said so freely these days that as soon as you even mention the word, people refuse to believe it. Especially as he is five years older than me, he seems to think his age automatically gives him maturity. Total lie. This maturity quite clearly means he understands love and when people mean it. Total lie.

Not only are his thoughts on the L word stubborn, his trust issues are off the scale. His peculiar saying ‘Allow it’ is something that is consistent in his ridiculous and immature vocabulary…I mean what are we actually ‘allow-ing’ here? Maybe he should allow the L word and maybe an orange, dwarf, ghetto booty girl like myself. 

You would think he wants me to himself but that couldnt’ be further from the truth. Shockingly, I am still awaiting the blessing of his question “Will you be my girlfriend?” Is it the hard to get attitude keeping me intrigued?

Women are renowned for judging themselves against the stereotypical media; a feeling of half best always arises. I have made this mistake. His ex of four years, a page three model may I add, gives me the annoying feeling of jealously 24/7. Within this self-doubt it leaves you half asleep to things he is doing; buying magazines with her splashed across the centre pages. Do feelings not run deeper than that these days? Call me old fashioned but months of undeniable lust and affection are worth more than a few sneaky pictures of your ex struggling to remember where she left her dignity. Maybe that is the reason to why he started drooling when I mentioned having a boob job in the future?  

We all want that one guy to notice when we put in insane amounts of effort from investing in a Primark air boost bra with extra padding, going along with the football talk to keep them interested, when really you couldn’t give a stuff and tanning the inside of your legs so they are seemingly skinnier. He doesn’t even seem to notice when I change into a tacky tracksuit from a corset and suspenders. 

However, in some circumstances girls trust issues are just as bad. He smiles every time LMFAO come on the radio singing Party Rock because it reminds him of me. Also making himself late for work, after a half hour drive to fill my hot water bottle and tuck me into bed when I suffered woman flu. Are these moves that prove he does have deep feelings for me? Or am I to blind to see it. 

Meeting in a club, alcohol fuelled, finding each other irresistible, didn’t make a normal one night stand, we both went our separate ways at the end of the night. It formed something that makes me smile constantly. Reminiscing on the night, we still have barrels of laughter thinking about it and it is something that we like to reenact on a regular occasion, mojito on his bill please?

Every woman dreams of the chance to meet ‘Mr Right’ so they can fulfill their romantic desires. He might not be quoted ‘Mr Right’ and he might do everything the wrong way in the love rulebook but he does it the right way for me.  

Taking a trip back to year young, I may have to create a positive and negative list. Who ever said we are too young? Seems a good idea to evaluate whether the soppy stuff weighs out the bad! The cute stuff is all good and well to ‘aww’ at but when it come downs to it are the tears in the pillowcase worth it? A student life should be full of freedom and what better ‘get over’ strategy is that! I can’t seem to silence the voices in my head saying- you deserve better. There is no changing a guy that doesn’t like change so what is the point in sticking around to watch a dead end, boring? A get rid situation seems to be on the horizon. 

So there I am ready to finito whatever we were and there he is at my door. Hopefully realising his mind games are game over. 

Acting very suspicious, it felt like he was hiding something from me, maybe something that could make this end to the story easier? Cookie dough. My favourite hot dessert was what he had sneakily held behind his back. Just to stop you from worrying- I’m not this easily persuaded. Along with the dessert comes the question “I’m sorry, will you finally be my girlfriend?” Without a shadow of doubt, the word ‘yes’ slips off my tongue. Funny how everything bad disappears when you get what you want. Cookie dough? Tick. Cuddles on the sofa? Tick. Is he still the same? Danger. Who am I kidding? This boy will always have my heart. 

By Amy Blanchard


  1. Mixed emotions with this! can totally relate,definitely lol'd at "allow it" as J does that but more like "Lowwww that" ,are we in year 9 ? lol I'm glad you are happy and he finally asked! BUT in reference to the boob job,he should love you how you are, I know this is something you wanted before you even met him but alarm bells are ringing because boys only think of the end result and not the emotional journey/pain that would come if you actually got it done one day, WHICH I HOPE YOU WON'T BECAUSE YOUR LIL' BOOBS ARE CUTE,EX'S ARE EX'S FOR A
    REASON <3

    P.s if anyone reads this i do know this girl,not just being a weirdo lol xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

  2. que bonitoo!! te sigo, sigueme tu tambien :)